I didn't really catch the MTV Video Music Awards Sunday, but I did actually watch Lady Gaga's performance and I got to say it was pretty good. I question why is it that she didn't go over the top on the dresses and kept it rather simple. I'm all for her having the most outrageous dresses ever considering that it's part of what makes Gaga... well, Gaga, but this shows that keeping it simple still makes an impact.
But even though she fell when she got down from the piano, what made me do this was Justin Bieber's face during Gaga's performance. And I found his face to be the funniest thing ever. It was as if he was in a coma or maybe he got scared because he was attracted to a guy. His face was a total "DUH" moment. He didn't even move. Was his ass glued to the chair on did he have something stuck up his ass??? Ooh, I got it. Selena wasn't there next to him and he was all sad :( . Whatever the case, I looked for a picture of it and stumbled upon this one and I just had to put it in here. Have fun. Poor Beaver.
Just want to ask... What the fuck is the big deal about Bella and Edward's honeymoon??? They will have sex, just like every other married couple. She gets pregnant on her honeymoon??? How the fuck??? Every single day I go into the internet, I see a story about the honeymoon. Does everybody want to see only the honeymoon???
You wanna see two people having sex, WATCH PORN!!!!!!! Oh wait, porn is way to hardcore for teens, so lets have a vampire having sex with a human, which is way better for teens to watch. Give me a fucking break. If they are so into showing new pictures EVERY SINGLE DAY about the honeymoon, why would they sue someone for "leaking information" about the movie when everyone in the whole world knows they get married?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! its like the ending to New Moon where they have the most stupid cliffhanger ever. "Will you marry me?? *Surprised look*" The end. REALLY????????? What will he say???
Oh and we all know that the movie will end when she gives birth and I'm saying right now that there are two ways that they will end this one. She gives birth and they end the movie with her "dead", that way they can start the other one when she turns into a vampire, or they turn her, she gives an evil look (probably the first time she will show emotion), grab the baby and end it there. They are saying that the birthing scene will be gross and shocking but what I will find shocking is if Bella shows emotion considering that throughout every movie she shows nothing.
These fucking movies have one problem, once you start them, you are gonna have to end them. I will probably watch them, but a rent will probably suffice, that is unless I am dragged by some girl to see it. I guess Edward isn't gay, but still glows like a disco ball in the sun.
I just got back from watching Conan the Barbarian and I got a couple of complaints. First, the movie is not worth going to the theaters to see. Second, The 3D didn't work (there's a shock) and when they got it to work, it was really lame. And finally, there was a huge lack of "AHNOLD" in the movie.
But that's not what I am here for. I am here for sharks and I now that shark week was three weeks ago. As I was sitting there waiting for the movie to start, one of the trailers was for Shark Night 3D. Here where I have problem with these movies. In the trailer they show the shark eating people, but of course people still keep getting into the lake where the shark is.
So the trailer starts of all nice and cute with a group of college friends going to the lake. This is beginning to sound as an American Pie movie. After all fun and games, the black guy, who is water skiing, gets eaten by Speedy Jaws-alez. Honestly, this has to be the fastest swimming shark in the whole world. I watched the trailer again and it shows the black guy dead, but I don't see anything. No blood on the water, no decapitation, has both his legs and I can see both his arms. Did that shark drown him without using his teeth??? So after he gets eaten, from what I can make out, the guys driving the boat get into an accident and explodes. Instead of going back to their homes and contacting the authorities, they decide to stay there and have fun!!! "So they got eaten by the shark. Who cares??? LET'S PARTY!!!!!" Really??? It's like they think that the only place where it's safe to swim is where the black guy didn't get eaten.
This movie is from the producers of Hostel, which I liked, ONE of the producer of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and the director of Final Destination (that means #2 and #4)and that means that I'm really not interested. So, the characters decide to get into the lake, even though they have a pool in the house, to kill the shark. Shit, one of them goes "This is insane. It's a lake." while the other says "It's salt water." and that gets me confused. He says it's salt water but the synopsis clearly states that the are fresh water sharks, this could only mean that it's some type of Bull shark. I wonder if this movie will have a lot of bullshit.
You can see that there is someone that has the shark as a pet and let's him out so he can eat. I'm betting that by the end of the movie, that guy will get eaten by the shark. How do you spoil your movie with a 2 minute trailer??? The only "smart" person, from what I can see in the trailer is one of the blonde girls. She stays out of the water while the shark is following her boyfriend or I think it's her boyfriend, who cares??? But her smarts go down the drain when she decided to act as bait and gets into a shark cage. The reason for this??? So that the boyfriend can stab the shark. I don't know who is stupid enough, the blonde bait or the blond bait's boyfriend. And do we really need to see the girl bounce her butt before getting eaten by the shark???
If you go on a vacation and a shark kills your friend, will you go home to your family or will you go all hero and try to kill the shark??? And if someone gets killed by a shark why would you get back into the same lake where you know the shark is??? This prove that these movies are driven by the stupidity of the characters, same thing happened with Final Destination 5. I think this will be a "meh" movie, just like Conan.
Here we are. Final Destination 5 is out and if you haven't seen it, you should keep it that way. They have done airplane accident, car accident, roller coaster accident, race car accident and for number 5, bridge collapse. Before I get into number 5, I have to point out something. If the roller coaster accident on Final Destination 3 was caused because of the camera falling on the track, how is it that the accident still happened when the guy that takes the camera on the ride gets off it???
I really wasn't expecting anything new with this one and to my surprise, I was right. If anything it made me laugh. Sure the deaths are original, but lacking on the "wow" factor. The bridge accident, while its happening in his vision, takes 3 or 4 minutes to end, but like every other entry in this series, the actual accident happens in 10 seconds (excluding the first one).
This will probably be hard considering that my mind is trying to repress the movie.First thing that seemed stupid is the part where one of the girls is doing gymnastics. While she is on the balance beam, a screw falls from the overhead vent and lands right in the middle of the balance beam sticking up. After all the jumping, and moving on the balance beam, the screw never tips over and she doesn't even touch the thing. After two "near death" moments, she falls and breaks her back, but they make it seam like she fell from 10 stories up.
The second one dies when a Buddah falls on his head. That happens after he falls from the massage table and having the acupuncture needles go the whole way into his body. All of this happens because his cellphone was on vibrate and it pushes a lit candle to some towels. How does a vibrating cellphone move a big lit candle??? That must be one hell of a vibrator.
The third one dies... or rather, commits "suicide". She's the one getting Lasik eye surgery and everything goes wrong. Everything gets started just because the water cooler makes bubbles that knock down a paper cup with water that is sitting on top of it. How is that even remotely possible???? I have no idea. The water falls into a socket causing the machine to go over the safe limit of the laser. Nothing really happens, that is until the smart little girl decides to grab the "remote control" sitting on top of the machine. How does she know that its there when she never saw it??? And if she never saw it, how does she know it has a very big, red button with "Emergency Stop" written on it??? So, she obviously tips the control over and turns on the laser causing it to burn her eye and hand. She finally gets up and starts screaming "Help Me!" while her friends open the door to the office where she is. Wouldn't you think that if you have your friends right in front of you, you would go to them??? She doesn't. She screams again and takes a step back, AWAY from her friends causing her heel to break. Then she breaks the most weak glass window in the world causing her to fall on a car. Really???
After this, one dies when a wrench flies to his head, the black guy avoids death by killing someone else and takes whatever life the other guy had left. If this is the fifth movie, don't you thing that someone would have said something by now about taking other people's life??? So the gymnast's boyfriend tries to kill his friends to take their lives but gets killed while trying. Small little detail about the group that survived, they are so bland and boring I don't remember their names, the main girl in the movie never dies in the vision but they are treating her as if she did die and the most awesome character appears twice in the movie and he is not even part of the ones that survived.
Cut to a month later when the main guy and the main girl (the one that didn't die in the vision) are boarding a plane. Guess where it's going??? TO PARIS... And there is a guy that has a vision that the plane is going to blow up. What does the main guy do??? Stay in the plane as if nothing happened. If you have seen the first one then you may already know that this is a prequel. Main girl gets sucked out of the plane and into the wing and main guy gets burned alive. Oh, look, the black guy is alive. He's alive?!?!?!?! FINALLY!!!!!!!!! A black guy survives in a movie. Oh... The guy he killed was about to die because he had something in his brain which means... Yeah, the plane wheels fall on him, killing him. So much for having a little bit of originality.
For it to be a prequel, they really should have seen at least the first two movies to see what they know. If they could have taken the life of whoever they kill then why not say something on the other movies? Also, how is it that in the first one they never mention that someone had a vision before??? In this one they say that it has happened before, that other people have actually had visions. I like the inventive ways they use to kill people but I feel like they took the lazy way out here. Not really feeling the depth in the movie. Story, the same one as other movies and the characters are just there to get killed. You don't miss anything by passing on this one You are better off going to watch The Smurfs. Fucking Smurfs.
Again with the theaters here... Why is it that they can't get anything right???
This is the first thing that showed me that they were going downhill. Miss-spelling, broken movies, dirty 3D glasses and broken chairs. I went to see Horrible Bosses today (after all the weeks waiting for it to release) and I saw so many chairs that were broken, the screen was dirty and as always, the smallest room in the whole theater. Not going to talk about the movie because it was great and funny. But there were two other things that caught my eyes and not in a good way.
First of all, I didn't know they made a movie called "Captain 2D" and that it was filmed in 3D. I get that they didn't have enough space to put America there, but why not abbreviate "Captain" and use "Capt." and put America at the end. Sure, everyone knows Captain America is what they wanted to do, but come on.
Second thing that caught my eye was the miss-spelling of The Green Lantern. How do you mess something like that??? Easy. Forget the "N" at the end of lantern. If only I can say that it was only on one theater, but I saw the mess in two theaters. Oh' and one of them was the one that miss-spelled The Little Fockers. Why do I even bother trying to write about the stupidness here??? No idea. Maybe I like to torture myself. Well, I actually had to sit through The Smurfs three times. If I can get through that, I think I can get through anything. Like watching the most stupid Final Destination movie ever...Why do you scream for help when your friends are right in front of you??? And why take a step AWAY from your friends if you need help??? DAMN IT!!!!! I guess I will have to actually do this crap...
Rebecca Black's Friday is the most disliked song in YouTube. Why???? Because she was being serious about it and people thought it was a joke, that and the awful lyrics and the nasally voice did not help her cause. Now we have another video that sucks the same amount of balls. What do you know? It's a guy that sings it. A 55 year old casino executive named Allen Samuels or as he is calling himself A. Samuels. Way to go dude, you took your name and made it shorter. Some people are saying that this could be the worst video of the year and I think they could be right. Sure, Rebecca Black has the most disliked video and this guy doesn't but when you compare them, you can notice some differences and if had to choose one, it would be Miss Black's video.
Let's look at the facts, Rebecca Black is a 14 year old trying to make it into the entertainment world as a singer, she had to work hard to actually get something out there. Samuels on the other hand could be put under the "I'm having a mid-life crisis" category. How much work did he have to do to actually get a song and video out there??? Shit, he's a millionaire, you know he just had to take out his wallet and sing, even if it was bad. So let's dig into this...this... thing and figure out what the hell is it.
Before saying anything and hitting play on this, I see a couple of disturbing things. First of all, the name of the song Livin De Life. It's missing the G from living and instead of "the" he wrote "De". I get that he wants to be gangster and everything, but you could at least put an apostrophe after "Livin" and why use an E in "De", it would have been better if you put "Da" on there. It's not so hard. Secondly, there are selling this piece of crap for a dollar on iTunes??? I want to see the sales number for this song, I really do. That for me is an insult, but hey, its not the only one here. Let's dissect this bitch.
[Intro]
Livin de life
A. Samuels
Newark, New Jersey
Bringing it home
Shit, why don't you just tell us your social security number??? And why do I get the feeling that we are gonna hear Livin De Life every 5 seconds??? Not even Rebecca Black uses the word Friday so damn much. And I'm not even going to touch that joke of an intro to the video.
[Hook: x2]
Yo, I’m livin de life
Yo, I’m livin de life
And if you ain’t with it, shorty, then you part of the hype
And here we go. By the way, what hype is he talking about??? Don't you have to establish what it is you are singing about before actually telling us???
[Verse 1]
Player’s on the hardwood, golfer’s on the green
Cat’s making big papers, I got bitches in between
Doctor’s on call, gangsters that fall
I got lawyers that draw up papers for us all
Really??? Wow, I didn't know that. I thought golfer played on pools. Cat's making big paper??? Who the hell is Cat??? You got doctors on call just in case you run out of Viagra when you're with bitches that only want your money right??? Gangsters that fall??? What the fuck does that mean???
[Hook]
[Bridge]
Bringing home the paper to the family, to the wife But I ask them this question, “Are they livin de life?”
Yo, I ask them this question, “Are they livin de life?”
Yo, I ask them this question, “Are they livin de life?”
So he's the one paying the bills and he asks his family if they are living the life??? Dude, if they aren't living the life, they should be, but not like you are and was it really necessary to repeat the same thing three times???
[Hook: x2]
[Verse 2]
It ain’t about black, yo, it ain’t about white
It ain’t even about folks creeping in to the night
It ain’t about the Asians and it ain’t about the Jews
It ain’t about the Christians, Muslims, yo fools It’s all about the paper, power, livin de life
And if you ain’t with it shorty than you’re part of the hype
The caste system is what it is from the days of old
To today’s time that are fast that are bold
To the way that *we* live, and the way that *we* roll
And the way that *we* flow
G4′s, big Benzes and the jewelry and the cash
And if you ain’t got it, girl, don’t let your world crash
Because I’m livin de life
Yo I’m livin de life
And if you ain’t with it shorty then you’re part of the hype
I applaud him for saying that you can be great and that it doesn't matter what religion or race you are, but after that he says that it's all about having money and power. What kind of message is he trying to get across
[Hook: x2]
[Verse 3]
I know business men that got it, I know bitches that are cool
Politicians seem to think that they can overrule
Big city suburbs I live in the streets
Which one is yours shorty baby don’t go down in defeat
Yo look up now, before it’s too late
Do your thing get out of the gate
Like a fast horse or educated player on a bike
Get out there brother and, yo, live de life I love to know people with money that are young
Regular people that won’t talk ’til I’m done
People that can hoop, that can holler with spice
I ask you my brother, “Do they live de life?”
I spit lyrics for the brothers that got paper that got cash
For the poor with religion, no paper no stash
Chess players, rooks, pawns, kings and queens
Yeah we all must die but live your life in between
For you player that’s rolling living life on the go
For the sweeties at home who got kids on the low
To the people that protect us from the maniacs that infect us
The world is in a struggle, yo it’s all up in a fight
Don’t give up, don’t give up yo live de life
You are dedicating a song on saying that you have all this money, all these nice things and cars and you really expect us to believe that you live in the streets. Yeah, and The Smurfs is a good fucking movie. The next five lines make no sense whatsoever. This song is like a kid learning to talk, Just random sentences all mashed up together. Define young, because you ain't young. Shit, even a website (that has music on their name and has absolutely no music on their channel) calls you an "Old Rich Dude". I don't get this guy, now he says that he is better than the people that don't have money and that he did this only for the rich people??? This is a moron that tell us that he didn't do it for us and that he doesn't care, yet he wants us to pay a dollar to buy this song. That's like making a movie and saying that the movie is a piece of crap. Again, this makes no sense. What do the next three lines have to do with one another??? No shit, we have to live our life in between before we die. For the next couple of lines I say "Fuck you, I'm not reading"
[Hook: x2]
[Verse 4]
Yo casino is good it got me out of the hood
Now I’m livin de life just like I knew that I would
I was Brand Ernesto suits and vests
I was bringing in ballers only the best
From MJ, Ivy, Shaq and A.I
The bosses looked at me and said, “Damn, you fly.”
You're from the hood??? The roof of your house I can assume because if you really were from the hood, you would be better at this. you know, I think they were talking to the players you brought in and not you or maybe they were telling you to go away. The was a bad joke, but after hearing this, I've lot all logic.
[Hook: x2]
[Outro]
I’m livin de life
Yeah they’re crazy for this one
Riding in Miami and I’m flying to L.A
And I’m in New York I got something to say
(Yo, this guy’s got a twizzem chain, son!)
Dude, no one is crazy for this shit. Only in New York you can say things, right??? Why, people kicked the shit out of you on the other states??? And what the hell is a twizzem chain"???
This could be the worst video of the year. I know I hated it more than Friday but this one is a clear winner. This guy is clearly doing this because of a mid-life crisis, it's the only explanation. I know that he wants us to be serious but I can take serious a 14 year old with her whole life ahead of her over a 55 year old rich guy that can wipe his ass with $100 bills. Oh and I counted all the times her says "livin de life". He says it 33 times which is a little bit more than the 27 times Rebecca Black says "Friday" and in her defense, she says it on the chorus and not every two sentences. This song is ass and if you want to become a fan of Friday you should totally see this joke.
How many times have you seen something and went "WTF???". Well these are some of these moments that made me go "WTF???"
Really???
Everyone thinks she looks like a girl. I guess that's fair.
This has to be the crazy "I love cats" lady from "eharmony"
Oh yeah... some good ol' Hanky Panky... Oh, you mean the candy.
Speaking of Hanky Panky...
Wow, Shrek hit the gym hard.
Yes it is.
You said it, moran.
He really likes hairy girls.
OMG!!!!! I did not know that. Thank you for this plainly obvious observation.
Uh... How do you do that???
I KNEW IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There ARE no female Smurfs!!!!!!
No shit, Sherlock!!!!!
Was it a gold tooth??? I sense some hard hitting stuff going on in that bedroom.
Really??? In her defense, maybe if you get really drunk, squint your eyes and do it with the light off, she could probably pass of as Hermione... Well, she met them on the internet so there is no evidence that she had sex with them.
